The weather was finally nice enough to venture outside for some needed fresh air. I tend to hover and try to protect all the time, any time, every time. It was tough, but this time, I decided to lay low, stand back and let her be. Of course, something happened. She'd mastered the steps in the house, so this little one outside didn't seem like a big deal. I "know" it's not my fault, but I still feel guilty. That gut-wrenching, stomach-twisting, make you cry, "if only..." guilt that I can't seem to let go of. I know I can't protect her from every harm of this world, but I can try, right? I think it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do, so far, and know it probably won't get any easier...this thing called letting go. It's a balancing act. Being there for someone, loving them, guiding them, teaching them...then allowing them to figure out this world and do what works for them.
I will be there for my daughter, but will also try (that's a big TRY) to let her explore and experience what she needs to. I guess I knew it before it started...my job, as her mom. Aww, a balancing act indeed.
